Subject: Say What? From: Keeper of the Chronicles Reply-To: colel@earthlink.net Newsgroups: rec.arts.sf.written.robert-jordan NNTP-Posting-Host: bsg-ma1c-217.ix.netcom.com (209.110.250.217) Sorry about the wait: I didn't get in until almost 2 am Sunday night (with God as my witness, I will never fly through Pittsburgh again). Last night we got to watch the Bruins get one step closer to actually *making* the playoffs (which is a good thing since the Sox, quite literally, dropped it on opening day). Suffice it to say, my first social in Toledo was *awesome*, give or take a few technical issues with certain airplanes. I had a great time, but would have been unable to complete the quote list without dear Zeynep's help, as well as the various other handwritings I found in my magic notebook. If you helped to record, you have my thanks. For ease of archiving, I've picked up the quotes that Zeynep kept and included them with my own as a unified list. Hers still start with a *. Mine start with simply quotes. If I have misattributed anything, well, then, it simply means that you were in the right place at a good time, and no sense denying it. :-) * About how "Novak" is pronounced: "I don't care if he says it's pronounced 'Sarah', I am not going to argue." -- Laura * The sign on an auto body shop somewhere in PA: Picasso Auto *- Kenn: I didn't drop that glass! I set it down... - Novak: ...in midair... *About being "Mormonized": "...I'd just got up, hair all over the place, scruffly beard, t-shirt, shorts; look through the peephole, cute women! Open the door---_oh, shit_." -- Novak *About Maggie's kids running around and around chasing each other: - Zeynep: It's like having cats, only taller. - Novak: Cats with opposable thumbs? *"Don't invoke the children." -- Novak *"Food never looks quite as good coming out of your mouth as it does going in." -- Kenn *"The History Channel--or should I say, the war, feminine and pestilence channel." -- Ray "God, you're disgusting" --Kenn "I will be the Evil Genius" -Novak "Okay, you can be the manager" -Kenn "No, I feel nothing" -Anne "And Batman was tied to a boy." -Laura "Oh, is *that* what they mean by dancing the spears?" -John "You're a cheap date, and I don't mean that in a good way." Pam to Steve *"I find random strangers' laps the most interesting..." -- Leah "I'm not breaking _ANY_thing" --Kenn *About what "compassionate conservationism" is: "We kicked your ass in gentleness." -- Jeff "Where the hell is my Coffee?" -Novak "Kozlowski is orthogonal to reality." -Novak "Is that the Chainmail bra? Can i try it on?" --Daryl "Placate me with Bacon." -Novak "You are a juggernaut." --Roy "I overdosed on cutesy…I cannot grade this." --Zeynep "The first woman who sits on me dies." --Kenn "He licked my nose." --Pam "Did you think it was Novak?" -Roy "Everybody gather 'round and listen to Uncle Novak" --Unknown "The drugged trout store." --Pam "He started out as a lackey and got downgraded." --Novak "Thirty. Four. New. Messages." "Goddamnit!" -ensemble "Do you like the Pan-sy?" -Kenn "You have no mojo what-so-ever." -Pam "I'm crushed!" -Anne "I use all my fingers." --Pam "She's talking to me, Laura, I mean, come on!" -Jeff "When dolphins go bad." -Pam "Can I just die now?" -Zeynep "It's gotta be tight?" -Steve "You need a T for all the good curse words" "fuck," "wanker," "erikson" -ensemble "It's soft and gooshy and will slide easier." --Steve I've got to the point where I wonder what I'm doing with you people." --Zeynep "Mom, my phase is over." --Pam "I'll trade" -Novak "No thanks, you're not my type." -Steve "You know, I spent hours trying to break an unbreakable comb. Eventually I gave up and set it on fire." -Kenn "The only thing I was unable to destroy in the time allotted me was that damn frou-frou Australian dollar." --Novak *"I think M&M is kicking Lego's ass." -- Pam "Lego wins. Fatality." -Pam "I'll be back, you little doofus!" --Alex "Ernie, are you sure you really want your butt kicked?" --Alex *Reading Leah's quote book: "I didn't say that." -- Kenn *In a "Sixth Sense" voice: "I see dumb people..."-- Novak "No balls." "No balls??" "No balls." "Zero balls. Otherwise it would be fun." -Anne and Pam "No big deal. I don't mind being violated." --Jeff "At one point in time, every gun was occupied by darkfriends." -- Maggie "I'm not a bitch, I'm a warder. There's a difference." --Jeff "I didn't look that big in the picture." -Jeff "With these guys, it's woosh-woosh-done." --Maggie "What did I just eat?" --Anne *"Proctal Entomology: The fine art of pulling words out of your ass." - Steve "Don't ask what it is, just eat it." --Pam "Zeynep just put a tentacle in her mouth. I am officially impressed." --Anne "Now imagine a big group of 56 Asian men and women going ape-fucking- shit over basketball." -Jeff *After "contacting" wasabi: "Can I have some more of that soy sauce? Like, half a liter?" -- Zeynep *"Kill You". -- Embroidery behind a bad guy's robe in DragonBallZ *"Wicked" -- The Japanese character embroidered behind a good guy's robe in Kimshin "I'm much more a 'shovel to the back of the head from the top of the stairwell' guy." -Novak *Watching a character get a beating in the anime movie: "You fool, use up-down-up-down-A-B-Start!"-Jeff *Laura: There's something to be said about DragonballZ... Mark: ...yes, it makes no sense! I'll probably only drink half of this, but Oh. My. God. Do I want. It." -Leah "That's not a sword, that's an analogy." -Kenn "Ten minutes and a triple digit body count later, it's time for a commercial break. It's great." --Jeff "Who's your sensei? * whap *" -Steve "It helps if you push it in, Jeff" -Laura "Details!" -Jeff "I'm going down." -Jeff "Come again?" -Jeff "Jeff, instead of simply standing there, would you get me a cup of coffee?" -Novak "French toast is a delivery mechanism for syrup." -Kenn (I think). "BAH!" -Novak "Does your therapist have saggy man breasts?" -Novak *Seeing a very bright yellow house:- Kenn: Somebody needs to get in line with the rest of the block... - Anne: Yes. Drab, dammit, drab! *"[Steve] licked my glasses!"-- Maggie *"Don't think of that as lynching, think of it as sense beaten into you with vigour." -- Jeff *"There are certain things you don't do with baseball bats!" -- Jeff *"You have remarkably low taste in gods." -- Jeff *"Do you bite my ass?" "No, sire, but I do bite somebody's ass." -- Novak *"Oh, no, not the Booger Flick of Doom!"-- Novak *About asexual reproduction, Kenn to Jeff: "I don't want to see you split in half, OK?" "For maximum effect, they should use the wing-ding font." --Novak "I hope not, because David Scotton with a 40 D bust would be just wrong." --Steve *"We've got to start a commune." -- Maggie -- Leah L. Cole colel @ earthlink.net "Veni, vedi, dedi gremium bonum" --the Humblest Lap on the Net "Yeah, but eventually I'd have to pee."--me